Thursday, August 16, 2012

A Lot Like Me, Only Better.


Bruce has been going to football practice for about 3 weeks now. Though he says he likes it and its fun, and he is getting used to it and all he has to do, he still gets very emotional when he heads down to the field. He is so shy. He has not made and friends yet. He is kind of the odd kid out. Most of the other boys have already played football last year and know each other. He is just not as out going to talk to or make friends with the other kids. So, he walks down alone, and comes back up when he is down, alone.

I feel for him.
My heart breaks for him. I understand how scared, shy and nervous he must be.
He is so much like me in that aspect.

But I am beyond proud of him, because even though he is so much like me, he is still TOUGH and BRAVE. Just like The Daddy. He wants to do his best. To show no fear. So, though he has tears in his eyes, he grabs his gear and walks, head up, determined not to let a single teardrop fall. He walks alone and without hesitation, down to the field to the spot where his team meets. He knows what he has to do, and he does it.

I respect him for that. I am overwhelmed with emotion and pride because of that. That's something I'd NEVER do - or at least never would have done at his age.

I needed someone. Someone with me. A hand to hold. A leader to follow. Someone to make sure I was doing it right. Because even if I KNEW I was doing it right, whatever the situation, I still felt fear I might be doing something the wrong way. I needed and wanted that hand to hold. He, though he wants it, doesn't need the hand to hold. He is a lot more confident than I ever was at his age and even AM now sometimes.

He is a lot like me, only better.

As a parent that makes me so happy. It brings me joy and I say it again PRIDE (I cant say it enough).
Pride in my son, in who he is, and who we are raising him to be.

Shy. Awkward. Loving. Emotional. But also tough, confident and even more so... Brave.

I love this kid. So much. He makes my heart swell, my eyes water, and my lips smile.

3 comments:

  1. love it don't know why but it brought tears to my eyes. Maybe cause I am a mommy too and feel your pain of your little guy but love his strength to do what he needs to do. Thank you for sharing. I love reading all about your kids sinceI don't see them anymore. It is amazing how much trhey have grown and the things they are doing now.

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  2. I so love love and miss that boy! It brings tears to my eyes to read this about him, he is so tough and strong and so much like his daddy, this reminds me how much he is like you! I am so proud of both of you for hanging in there, putting yourselves out there and getting it done! Love and hugs your WA mom

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  3. I was always the odd kid out, too. I seemed to always be in a new situation. It taught me how to strike up conversation and also gave me a really quirky sense of humor because often I was having very funny internal conversation. He's a brave boy

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